Scene in a Lincolnshire Churchyard

To Cut a Short Story Short

(500 words)

Eyes, beady all-seeing eyes, watched from above as I stood at my father’s graveside. I turned my binoculars to watch the bird circling high above an adjacent field. It was russet with white patches at the end of each elegant, outstretched wing, a span of at least five feet I adjudged. Although too distant I knew there to be bold pupils within pale eyes, and flared nostrils in a hooked yellow bill. A majestic red kite. Now he (I imagined a male) was gliding effortlessly in a circle – looking for prey, whilst doubtless keeping a wary eye on me.
I looked back down at the green grass, dotted with yellow and orange crocuses, feeling the first warm sun of the year on my cheeks. Seven years ago, in this exact spot, I’d taken a handful of earth from a proffered container and dropped it into the…

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Stuck Writing Your Author Bio? Try The (Totally Not Serious) Author Bio Generator

Helen Glynn Jones

Aren't I fabulous and interesting? I’m so fabulous and interesting.

So I’ve been noticing a trend recently of, shall we say, somewhat overwrought author bios, in which every detail is teased into something magnificent, a picture of a life fabulously lived. I realise that there are, in fact, authors who do live wonderfully exciting lives but I also seem to remember a time when it wasn’t really important to know about it. A time when an author bio was a few lines at the end of a book, photograph optional, and usually read something like: ‘Author X was born in Wiltshire, and still lives there with her husband and three sons.’ Then, if Author X had written other books/and or won awards, these would also be listed. And that was about it. (I’m basing this on the very scientific research of spending time perusing my own bookcase and reading famous author bios, so you know…

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